It is the first day of my second semester, I am wearing a bright orange Khaadi kurta and I paired it up with black jeans, which precisely indicate the fusion of the eastern girl who is getting education from institutes based in UK.
Right before, I leave for university, I look myself in the mirror while bouncing my wavy hair and I say to myself we are ready to know it all through the power to understand.
In order to, understand something often a teacher is needed. Perhaps, sometimes life turns out to be that teacher. However, here I talk about a professor with whom I was able to bond well through understanding the power of words.
As I entered his first cultural studies class with a bright smile on my face, eyes full of curiosities and sense of belonging. He begins his class by asking each one of us to reflect our culture in a sentence.
Had it been some other course class, I would have tried implementing my friends teaching of answering diplomatically but here I choose to stay unfiltered.
So, I answer him by saying “Wedding ceremonies reflect our culture” typically the south Asian culture which was earlier practiced by Hindus and as we lived with them so we adopted their customs, traditions and norms perhaps all these factors make up a culture.
Certainly, this discussion was not enough to understand culture and the image it forms in the mind of young women because the South Asian women are not allowed to put bold lipstick shades, have noise piercing or even wear sarees before marriage.
Not just this but a single woman is not accepted to travel alone.
That’s how, the most women are grown up into controlling their desires and aiming to fulfil each desire after marriage. This is why, most young women around me often talk about the hatred towards men because in the past, women were ruled by men and a few still consider, being committed to a man can be a ticket towards freedom.
As here we talk about freedom so it is vital to mention that, history has proven that gaining freedom has never been easy and the cost of freedom could be high due to which, compromises are made while gaining freedom.
In between, identifying our culture and looking at the relationship of wedding ceremonies made me go through the social media pages of wedding planners, photographers, couture designers and of course, the face of Pakistan which includes the Pakistanis.
Often, the Pakistani celebrities specially on social media are considered to be representatives of not just their point of views but of whole country.
Here on, let’s talk about social media so Elif Shafak in her book, how to stay sane in an age of division said, social media is like a moon with a bright side as well as, dark side.
So, when I come across problematic statements by the Pakistani celebrities without a doubt they are considered to be the dark side of the moon.
This being said, I would like to mention that a famous actress advised all the single girls out there to find a husband as caring as her husband and that day, I realized why south Asian woman do not have the concept of finding things inwardly which they try to seek outwardly.
This is because, hunting a perfect groom is portrait to be the purpose of a woman’s life and that’s how, it is included in her upbringing.
As a result, the seeds of finding acceptance outwardly are planted into the mind of women and unfortunately, those contagious seeds keep transferring into the generations to come.